Sunday, September 11, 2011


:the unfortunate aspect of something; a shocking or sad event; disaster

We all have felt it.  The shock, the vulnerability and devastation.  The how could this possibly happen? But it does and it has.

And I have come to understand that tragedy isn't something you hope to never collide
with or pray God keeps you away from.
But instead tragedy is as much a part of life as weddings and birthdays. 
As much as we want to deny
and live without it
tragedy happens.

On this anniversary of 9/11, my heart commingles with those who have lost.  I remember along with them that day, huddled with my 3 little ones.   Wondering what was next.  Why did this happen.

My heart could not really completely empathize though what that loss really was.  How could it really--  I did not have someone close to me who was lost or my life was not drastically impacted like the ones left behind.
For me tragedy took on it's significance on a spring day in 2007 when a simple climb up a ladder, a ride to the ER and 3 weeks in the hospital and months of recovery, set off a chain of events that changed everything. 
Witnessing the love of your life virtually
fighting for his does that to you.

Suddenly all of those little details like laundry, keeping a clean house and getting
to practices on time dimmed in comparison to each other.
Funny how that happens.
I couldn't tell you what it was
but I do remember that right before his fall, I was frustrated with him about something.

Tragedy does that to you.  Causes you to laser focus on the really important.

I am lucky, unlike the thousands who lost their loved ones on 9/11,
I still have mine. 
At the time and during that next year-remember the chain of events?
I did question.  Questioned my faith.  God. 
We did experience loss though-
our church, big dreams we had,
people we had trusted,
and ultimately our home.

In all that loss and all that tragedy came some real laser focus.
And while we felt a bit beaten and bruised.....we were not crushed.
And in all that questioning, God still loved us and cared for us. 
And we didn't loose faith.
Or each other.

2Cor. 4:8-12 in the Message version of the Bible says~
We've been surrounded and battered by troubles, but we're not demoralized; we're not sure what to do, but we know that God knows what to do; we've been spiritually terrorized, but God hasn't left our side; we've been thrown down, but we haven't broken. What they did to Jesus, they do to us—trial and torture, mockery and murder; what Jesus did among them, he does in us—he lives! Our lives are at constant risk for Jesus' sake, which makes Jesus' life all the more evident in us. While we're going through the worst, you're getting in on the best!

And this I KNOW to be true.  Through ALL of it God was with us.  And when I needed His presence the most on those long days waiting for Doctors in the hospital, He was with me.  Holding me completely together.
And during all the recovery, and questions and loss when maybe I wasn't "feeling" it, and all the hard work of healing-----yet  He was there.
Working on our behalf- for our best.

In our tragedy, it brought us to a new place.
Yes, a new state, new home- all new.  Very Exciting now.
But the best is that He has given us new perspective and new passions.
New love for all He has done- and new love for each other.

And as I have watched all of the footage of 9/11- remembering.  I am seeing new there too. 
Healing.  So many giving God the glory for how their tragedy has taught them- given them new.

To those who are still hoping to find that healing-  Keep after it...... 
God does have that for you, I promise.

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