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Thursday, September 1, 2011

12

Spring Break 2011, Williamsburg, VA
Needing to breathe and feeling a lack of Vitamin D, I stepped out into the sunshine.......and just walked.
I picked up my pace deciding this would be part of my workout as well.
My girl Hannah came following me on her bike.
"What are you doing mom?  Can I ride along?"
Sure, I answered.  And the thought occurred to me- she will be twelve in just days! 
Twelve. 

If you have ever spend any time with an almost 12 year old girl, you would know that my quiet time in the sun was over. 
American History Museum, Washington D.C. Spring Break 2011
I didn't mind.........twelve turns into 20 all too rapidly.  Savor this.

She chatted about her big day.  What she wanted to do.
She talked about her hopes.  Her dreams.   Anxiousness of starting a new school.  again.

I could hear the echos of my own 12 yr old voice.......The seeking to fit in yet wanting to be my own person.   The- who am I anyway?
Part of me is excited for these days.  A girl to delight in, talk with, choose the cutest shoes and best outfit with and watch the girly movies my boys wouldn't dare to...

Hannah preparing for her JoJo role in Seussical, May, 20011.

How do I guide my very own girl through this growing up when there are days I feel so ill-equipped? When I still struggle with the image in the mirror....  with the whys and hows of life.

My sweet girl.  How I would like to make this journey of becoming a woman easy for you.
Take away all the measuring sticks the world is going to hold up to you.
The constant comparisons.
 
But I can't.
I can live it out though.

I can rely solely on my Creator, my Redeemer for wisdom and strength to be the
woman He has created me to be.  Measuring up with His vision of me.
Despite what the culture tells me I should be.  look like.  act like.

I am keenly aware of how I respond to this culture's draw to constant comparison impacts my girl........and all the women in my sphere of influence.

The other day reading on my bed.
A friend read this verse to encourage me the other day.

Psalm 43:3-4a~
Give me your lantern and compass,
      give me a map
So I can find my way to the sacred mountain,
      to the place of your presence, 
To enter the place of worship,
      meet my exuberant God...(The Message)

This truly is the only way for me to guide her.  Help me God.

Twelve.  Happy Birthday precious girl.

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